I wish I were here.
And I wish I had a beer
Just to have me near...

I loves me some 'Ku.
Yes sir ma'am, I shorley do.
It gets me so hai!

Drop that haiku NOW!
Turn around, hands raised. Don't move.
I'm warning you mom...

Intangible thong:
Unsinkable thang. Hit gong!
(Unthinkably wrong)

Why can I not sleep,
Texting haiku in bathtub...?
Pull the plug on this.

Going down i'm new;
I've discovered useful loads.
To give a Good job.

That syllababble:
it was always missinging.
(But they founded it.)

Missing syllable
Find it in the litter pan
with your “poetry “

For the love of G-d
This is a library, sir
Shush the fuck up

I enjoy shouting...
From time to time it's just fun.
Get my ya-yas out...

CAPITAL LETTERS
not the font of all knowledge
just a bit shouty

It's HERMENEUTICS!
It's INTERPRETIVE CONTEXTS.
Circles of meaning...

navalny gets dead
you might fall from a window
or just fall from grace

cupid draws his bow
americans draw their guns
more hearts get broken

Be my valentine.
Be my haiku valentine.
Here's my haiku heart.

Lighten up snowflake
Yous haikus ain't so great there
Esther Williams gooch

Picking up your trash
Is like reading your haiku:
Throw in garbage bin.

Prisoner of love
Picking up mental garbage
Tom Bosley's penis

Thanks for your interest
You can start with cleaning up
your rotten haiku

Every prisoner
Should be made to pick up trash
So the streets are clean.

Love me good TV
Want to go where fashion sits?
Putin on the Ritz

Hello.

Hello.

Interview input:
Smoke that in pipe and put in.
Put in your haiku.

my interrobang
punctuates your fancy font
irresistably

Certain ethnic groups
Are incomprehensible
They slur their words so.

Dont speak english
not my words
just googles’

Infungible tan:
Invisible bikini...
Intangible fun.

buy my cryptocoins
they're fun but non-fungible
intangible tang

Smoking cigarettes
I know they're not good for me
But I'm addicted

Watching TV, bruh
Listening to *good* music
Jeremy Shada

Bad Haiku goes on
Getting worse as years go by
A cesspit of bilge

Haiku never dies.
It just becomes worse and worse,
Then moves to this site.

bad haiku endures
like untreated haemorrhoids
blow it out your arse

Back in ninety eight
I submitted bad haiku
Still bad years later

well, fuck the donald
even if you don't want to
it's not like he cares

Check this doomsday cuck:
ninety boosters to nanny--
but his mind is Trumped.

check the doomsday clock
ninety seconds to midnight
but the hands are stuck

Lost humanity:
it rhymes with insanity.
(Christianity?)

Oriental bots:
Got this site tied up in knots.
YOU: connect the dots.

it's not a piss-take
newsworthy royal prostate
unfit for a king

Trump lives on. Your mind
Ruminates on Orange Man . . .
You can't let it go.

iowa-wa-wah
you can hail the donald but...
he's a complete dick

fried ex-president
thick skin basted in orange
but tiny giblets

Murcan Empire: dead.
But running like a chicken
with its head chopped off.

i smell it coming
fall of the murcan empire
orange flames rising

ah, sweet ozempic
opiate of the massive
new heroin chic

influencer (noun) :
a contagious disorder
that disrupts your sells

foul epidemic
bringing altered mentation
malignant desire

retail therapy
prescribed by the vacuous
is no remedy

we need less not more
if this disease keeps spreading
the planet if fucked

Whites who talk like blacks:
It annoys me to no end
Mush-mouth wannabes.

oy vey! what you say?
it's not really genocide
because they're arabs