Bad Haiku
Horrible poetry for the digital age
27 Years, 166 Days and 77047 Haiku later...

Jesus must be happy to be slandered
by a petulant scumbag who has
the charisma of a rodent gloating
about the poison it's eating
I've met rats with better personalities
which says a lot because rats eat their own shit and you might too but at least rats don't brag about it
Haiku # 64650, May 7, 2019 2:11 am ET
by Anonymous Prophet
When playing in your own poop
It is important to remember
You are the only one covered in poop
Haiku # 64649, May 7, 2019 1:17 am ET
by Advice for Retarded Satanist
Somersault Handstand
Jumping Jack Jumping Jack split
Wank. Ejaculate
Haiku # 64648, May 6, 2019 7:24 pm ET
by Darthrobics of Fitness Gymnasium
Tsunami of filth
syllabic, dull, moronic:
lyric mind of Darth
Haiku # 64647, May 6, 2019 6:06 pm ET
by Haiku Antiseptic Spray of Poetic Hygiene Vigilante Squad
Inconsolable
Sehnsucht identified now
It's Cedric; Mark him
Haiku # 64646, May 6, 2019 4:44 pm ET
by Ledge of Kentucky
Jesus is hairless
He keeps a flavor savor
On his chin sometimes
Haiku # 64645, May 6, 2019 3:39 pm ET
by Tuna
Jesus has a beard
To cover the cum splotches
Gotten through the years
Haiku # 64644, May 6, 2019 2:43 pm ET
by Failure of The mental health system
I'm in the next stall
I'm shitting like a racehorse
I'm scratched from the race
Haiku # 64643, May 6, 2019 12:00 pm ET
by All bets are off
It is what it is
Radioactivity
Leaking from my ass
Haiku # 64642, May 6, 2019 11:51 am ET
by It is what it is
Bad. It's BAD BAD BAD.
That is what this Haiku is.
All because of you.
Haiku # 64641, May 6, 2019 10:37 am ET
by Excavated Tombs of Haiku
Watch me lift this car
Dead lifting an Elephant
Proof of my manhood
Haiku # 64640, May 6, 2019 1:48 am ET
by Man with microscopic penis of In my sports car
Hi.

I have a very short questionnaire I'd like to present and thank you in advance for answering.

Do you prefer Listerine, Scope, or Colgate mouthwash?

And what is your preferred flavor?

It's for a class project.

Thanks again.
Haiku # 64639, May 6, 2019 1:06 am ET
by student
Necrophilia
Among the only reasons
To like dead people
Haiku # 64638, May 6, 2019 12:36 am ET
by Can't think of A fucking thing
Charlie died for you
Your fake Jesus was God s son?
Charlie was Mans Son
Haiku # 64637, May 6, 2019 12:23 am ET
by Witchy of Creepy Crawling
I said EAT YOUR MUSH
I don t wanna eat my mush
I SAID EAT YOUR MUSH!
Haiku # 64636, May 6, 2019 12:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I said EAT YOUR MUSH
I don
Haiku # 64635, May 6, 2019 12:21 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
Yes
Charlie Manson is dead
And you will be too, soon enough
Haiku # 64634, May 6, 2019 12:19 am ET
by Anonymous Prophet
Best part of the night
When Jesus made the table
Levitate (No Hands)
Haiku # 64633, May 5, 2019 10:20 pm ET
by Mary Magdalene knows how of Under Table
Is there a difference
Between the Lord Jesus Christ
And Charlie Manson?
Haiku # 64632, May 5, 2019 10:15 pm ET
by Squeaky Fromunda of Mouse who lives under a slab of cheese
In all fairness Catholic doctrine states
Jesus was adopted and is God
And is therefore his own father
Seem to have serious daddy issues
Completely ignoring John 3;1-8
But religion is not God
At least Catholics believe something
And don't just post poop/sex haikus
Haiku # 64631, May 5, 2019 10:06 pm ET
by Anonymous Prophet
Honor the Father and the Mother
And the one speaking evil
Of father or mother
In death must end
Haiku # 64630, May 5, 2019 9:59 pm ET
by Anonymous Prophet of Matthew 15;4
What an idiot.
The extent ofyour revolt:
bad-mouth Catholic mass!
Haiku # 64629, May 5, 2019 9:21 pm ET
by Boring Infantile Rebellion of Darth
Extra syllable
Kinda like the holy ghost
It's invisible
Haiku # 64628, May 5, 2019 7:26 pm ET
by frank kosher of under the table
That's what they all ate
Over at The Last Supper
Undercooked kielbasa
Haiku # 64627, May 5, 2019 7:22 pm ET
by Mary Magdalene of under the table
Went to church today
Christ stuck his dick in my mouth
Strange tasting wafer
Haiku # 64626, May 5, 2019 6:41 pm ET
by Fever for the flavor of A pringle
Left halfway through mass
In the name of the Father
Son and RUNNY SHIT!
Haiku # 64625, May 5, 2019 5:20 pm ET
by 2 much gluten Salute of Backend Blowout
Went to church today
High AF at communion
Ate all the wafers
Haiku # 64624, May 5, 2019 5:15 pm ET
by Dat a sin? of Confessional
What will the day bring?
Festering ingrown ass hairs?
A suitcase filled with cash?
Haiku # 64623, May 5, 2019 5:11 pm ET
by Biotch

I found some haiku
and Japanese poetry.
I won and you lost!
Haiku # 64622, May 5, 2019 3:47 pm ET
by Da-su Feeg pakuru saksu
That bald alien
Is he 17 feet tall
With a huge boner?
Haiku # 64621, May 5, 2019 1:41 pm ET
by interested
Ever wonder why
They call it fecal matter?
Nothing else matters
Haiku # 64620, May 5, 2019 1:35 pm ET
by Lavatory Laureate of Lavatory
Tom Vagina Soup
I followed the recipe
Not enough poon tang
Haiku # 64619, May 5, 2019 1:28 pm ET
by Cannibals Soup of Mmm Mmm Good
caught in the middle with the next door poet with the horrid shit breath and the bald alien who hasn't gotten anything but ass from his boy toy on a leash
Haiku # 64618, May 5, 2019 11:50 am ET
by They sucks Eachothers Dick of NOMNOMNOM
Isn't that special?
You must be friends of SATAN!
said the Church Lady.
Haiku # 64617, May 5, 2019 10:57 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
deranged secretly from years of torture not knowing her daughter was fucking her making her moan her son came in and fucked her too
Haiku # 64616, May 5, 2019 9:25 am ET
by Offspring Orgy of Flesh of my Flesh
When she was old enough she defended her mother and she stabbed him yet mother was dumb and full of cum. Only to find out Mother wasn't mother in the first place.
Haiku # 64615, May 5, 2019 9:19 am ET
by SwitchEd At Birth of Loss of Memory
Love the Lily who hid away years ago
He almost tore out her tiny little womb
Haiku # 64614, May 5, 2019 9:17 am ET
by Torn Vagina at 1 years old of Mother Hid Her From Them
Loved him so much and thought it was her who hurt the girl behind the scenes
but it was the boy who grew from out of her very womb years ago that little bastard fucking thing
Haiku # 64613, May 5, 2019 9:15 am ET
by Trust No Dick of I See Why She Chopped It Off and Lied on Mother
The flies came from the maggot daughter ISIS of false life
but she liked to fuck her daughters and eat their pussies in mens bodies
Haiku # 64612, May 5, 2019 9:13 am ET
by How many times did her Mother of Get fucked by her daughter
Poor Phractured Phallus
Snapped like an Essem hot dog
Dingaling in sling
Haiku # 64611, May 5, 2019 8:31 am ET
by No action of In traction
Discounted Dildoes
Dented! Damaged! Dirty!
Dingaling Decoys
Haiku # 64610, May 5, 2019 8:28 am ET
by Dildora de Explora of cuntflaps
Should have stayed at home
And minded his own business
Don t mess with larvae
Haiku # 64609, May 5, 2019 8:24 am ET
by Cunt flies of Cesspool
Should have stayed at home
And minded his own business
Don
Haiku # 64608, May 5, 2019 8:24 am ET
by Cunt flies of Cesspool
strangled with his dreads
his shitty girlfriend convulsed
the so called leader tried to make her die and the weak ass boyfriend stood there and said bye bye as her last tear rolled out of her eye
then he got ass fucked by sloth the fat pink titty leach worm
Haiku # 64607, May 5, 2019 6:57 am ET
by BOY?GIRL? of 9th realm
Soaking your penis
In high fructose corn syrup
Does not make it grow
Haiku # 64606, May 5, 2019 3:39 am ET
by Old wives tales
I just sucked his cock
He shot a hot cum nugget
Clear across the street

We shared the cole slaw
Handy KFC bucket
We both shit in it

Then, as if on cue
A mean Cassowary bird
Ass raped a hobo
Haiku # 64604, May 5, 2019 3:31 am ET
by How you doin
With Bernie Sanders
Split order of chicken wings
He didn't share them
Haiku # 64603, May 5, 2019 3:23 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
I have a handgun
No not a pistol, silly
My hand IS a gun
Haiku # 64602, May 5, 2019 12:38 am ET
by Anonymous Poet
No mystery there
I threw coins in a fountain
Then I made a wish
Haiku # 64601, May 4, 2019 7:35 pm ET
by All I wanted was a hotdog of Europe is cray cray
I went to Paris
But got a blowjob in Rome
Is that possible?
Haiku # 64600, May 4, 2019 7:24 pm ET
by Too much of A good thing
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