On the next big fight
with my evil fat-assed wife,
I'm leaving that bitch.

Bananas are good.
And they are quite good for you.
Eat four ev'ry day.

Porn porn porn porn porn.
Porn porn porn porn porn porn porn.
Porn porn porn porn porn.

Incredible ass.
I saw one swimming today.
She saw me looking.

Lugis are slimy.
They'd be good for jacking off.
Can your dick catch cold?

Vinegary balls.
I just had to write that down.
Just don't ask me why.

I know this is strange.
Lately I pinch my nipples.
I used to hate that.

Just imagine it:
Fifty shades of bad haiku
without any spam.

I should post nude pics
of myself eating ice cream
with a dead tuna.

Popped like a cream puff.
Testicular infection.
Imagine the stench.

I should get money.
My poems are just that bad.
Drop them on China.

Goddamn this suck ass.
I spend all this fucking time
and I don't get paid.

I have throat VD.
Should not have gone down on wife.
It stinks anyway.

Fucking power's out.
Lucky I have a backup.
Unlike my penis.

Can I get fifty
all in a row without spam?
If so, I'll jack off.

The mojito drink
is about as gay as sperm
but has less protein.

Buckets of yak snot
are used to make mayonnaise
for your BLT.

Crocodile cock
preserved with strong vinegar
can cure HIV.

This is so easy.
I can keep it up all day.
Haiku, not my dick.

Vaginas are bad.
I mean they are pure evil.
They produce children.

My penis fell off.
If you see it let me know.
Its name is Tiny.

I saw a spaceship.
ET then abducted me.
But no anal probe.

Do you fuck chickens?
I enjoy fucking chickens.
So does your grandpa.

'been to hell and back
went with your mom to smoke crack
It was a fun time

My cat is happy
tail up run to bathroom
faucet water love
great web

I've been to Hell and
It's roughly as bearable
As this place

Symbiotic plant
Not here to hurt anything
Just wants to hang out

i want to find a
place not quite google eyed and
away from all this

one might ask why these
spambots keep posting random
nonsense statements

Dead written subject material, Really enjoyed studying.

Dead written subject material, Really enjoyed studying.

Dead written subject material, Really enjoyed studying.

I love all of you
But why do you post pictures
Of pieces of shit?

I've been to Hell and
It's roughly as bearable
As this crazy place

well if the old me
comes along and posts stuff then
it will be an even

bigger mess

This place was once fun...
Now it is just a big mess
A sign of the times

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Inverted boneless.
The very best pork rectums
that money can buy.

The more links to porn
and tasteless material,
the less spammers strike.

It is simple math.
Porn gets low google search scores.
Porn links are poison.

The more disgusting,
The lower the google rank.
dead-cat-sex (dot com).

Just if it's legal.
A prison cell with Jared
could not be much fun.

Check out that fine ass!
Fodder for a great haiku!
You see, I was right!

Dingleberry pie.
Just like grandma used to make.
Please hold the TP.

Mexican Haiku.
I should post some donkey porn.
Drug wars and spam bots.

Eeyore's Vacation.
Tijuana freak show gig.
He came back smiling.

tasty taco treats
also tasty lemon treats
they are so tasty

It's been many years
Since I've been on Bad Haiku
Why did I return?

You should not complain.
And you thought you had blue balls.
Do not mess with smurfs.

My cat is happy
tail up run to bathroom
faucet water love
visit us

last one i promise
anything else in person
bird bird bird's the word

so as i am raised
so is that ancient serpent
anyway fuck him