BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
68 Days
and
61767 Haikus
later...
When you are the best
The best part is the best smell
That comes from your farts
Haiku #61562, by Sniffy
January 8, 2019 7:01 am ET

Pizza is my friend
Circle triangle yum yum
Chomp chomp fart fart fart
Haiku #61561, by Greasy Pete of Poop pants
January 8, 2019 5:35 am ET

Appreciation
Couldn't they show it just once
No. Shit in their soup.
Haiku #61560, by Alice of Brady Residence
January 8, 2019 5:29 am ET

He farted toothpaste
Freak of nature. Minty Fresh.
Smelly Cavity
Haiku #61559, by Fangtooth
January 8, 2019 4:22 am ET

Kimono Bad stain
Ancient Japanese Secret
Use toilet paper
Haiku #61558, by Kaka PooPoo of Terlit
January 8, 2019 4:20 am ET

Vagina Sniffer
The pay stinks. the cunt stinks too
Nose to the grindstone
Haiku #61557, by Jack Off of Box
January 8, 2019 4:18 am ET

Potato hard on
Ejaculating Spud
Potato stick spew
Haiku #61556, by Vegetables are gross
January 8, 2019 4:15 am ET

Everlasting Fart
Dense cloud hovering, drone like
Mission Accomplished
Haiku #61555, by E. mission of In the air tonight
January 8, 2019 4:13 am ET

Crumble stale Cheeto
Defective and past shelf life
Bloated, racist pig
Haiku #61554, by Anonymous Poet
January 8, 2019 12:32 am ET

Here lies Swollen Gland
Buried with his dick in hand
Death Boner unplanned
Haiku #61553, by Life is weird of Smegmatery
January 7, 2019 7:28 pm ET

Only Indians
are truly spiritual.
We white men are not.
Haiku #61552, by Professional Indian-Lover of the Vavished West
January 7, 2019 7:27 pm ET

Standing on the corpse
Activated ding dong nerve
Funeral postponed
Haiku #61551, by Couldn
January 7, 2019 7:21 pm ET

Shogun of hung low
Lost his danoinks with one blow
From the Blunderbuss
Haiku #61550, by Gun Shy
January 7, 2019 7:18 pm ET

I stand on your corpse.
I write Haiku epitaphs.
Your cadaver grins.
Haiku #61549, by Haiku of Death
January 7, 2019 5:17 pm ET

Deranged by Donald
It's now a global symptom:
orange harbinger...
Haiku #61548, by Gibbering Multitudes of Leftard Mobs
January 7, 2019 10:33 am ET

Lord Cheeto rises,
shining, resplendent, orange.
Bow ye before him.
Haiku #61547, by Another whiny Lib of Trump Derangement Syndrome
January 7, 2019 10:30 am ET

Oh such Haiku crimes;
defiling a pristine form.
Basho-san vomits
Haiku #61546, by Shogun of Gun Show
January 7, 2019 9:50 am ET

Ok, so I lied
The moment you fell asleep
I took out my knife
Haiku #61545, by Liar
January 7, 2019 4:33 am ET

I'll watch over you
All night while you're sleeping, friend
I won't touch your dink
Haiku #61544, by Promise
January 7, 2019 4:18 am ET

In the Instant Pot
The severed head of Braydon
The Target Cashier
Haiku #61543, by BraydenJaydencaydenGreydon of Asinine names
January 7, 2019 3:52 am ET

Police at your door
Invest in a pet grizzly
Glaze doughnuts with bleach
Haiku #61542, by Pig Puncher
January 7, 2019 3:46 am ET

Clean Asshole Award
I would win that. Hands down(pants)
Fingernails B. Brown
Haiku #61541, by Digger
January 6, 2019 6:49 pm ET

Holey Communion
Saw the priest's dink hanging out
Get a sewing kit!
Haiku #61540, by Sunday Churchgoer of Church
January 6, 2019 6:45 pm ET

Dead Reawaken
They moonwalk and twerk. So evil!
Turn off the music
Haiku #61539, by Had it of Up to here
January 6, 2019 5:24 pm ET

Something in the air
Artisan cheese. Midget owned.
Fromunda their balls.
Haiku #61538, by Mindya of Business
January 6, 2019 5:20 pm ET

Starkitten had wit.
Darth Figpucker stinks of shit.
The dude from Maine split (?)
Haiku #61537, by Starpucker Figkitten
January 6, 2019 3:38 pm ET

GOVERNMENT SHUT-DOWN!
I'm so frightened. God I'm scared.
Lord Cheeto, help us.
Haiku #61536, by Cowering Minions of Lord Cheeto of Orange
January 6, 2019 3:34 pm ET

Home Economics
I
Haiku #61535, by Sofa King (Handsome) of Living Room
January 6, 2019 3:12 pm ET

Bright lights of spring:
nothing to do. But darn, dad
deep throat your OWN socks...
Haiku #61534, by Foot Fetish of Librarians
January 6, 2019 12:59 pm ET

Dark nights of winter
Nothing to do but darn socks
And deep throat your Dad
Haiku #61533, by Longing for Spring
January 6, 2019 2:30 am ET

Is Starkitten real?
A librarian? Really?
I never knew that
Haiku #61532, by Tweety
January 5, 2019 10:21 pm ET

Greasy big old balls
No, I don't want to touch them
They really stink bad
Haiku #61531, by Anonymous Poet
January 5, 2019 8:17 pm ET

I'm a fig picker
Got sticky brown fingernails
I pick the best figs
Haiku #61530, by Figpicker
January 5, 2019 11:40 am ET

Numerology
Sitting on the toilet:2
Edge of the bed:69
Haiku #61529, by Human Calculator
January 5, 2019 11:32 am ET

I'll never win it
The Clean Fingernails Award
I pick my asshole
Haiku #61528, by Fudgy
January 5, 2019 11:19 am ET

Syllable Sybil
All my personalities
Damn, they're all poets
Haiku #61527, by Cephalapoet
January 5, 2019 11:17 am ET

Honshu Librarian
Please don't shush me this morning
Bad sushi farts today
Haiku #61526, by Patron of Methane to my madness
January 5, 2019 11:11 am ET

Compulsive this is.
Type and type and type and type.
say hi to Yoda
Haiku #61525, by Death to Haiku
January 5, 2019 9:58 am ET

Back to Genesis
(as in P-orridge). That thing
is so pathetic.
Haiku #61524, by Genderless Pronouns of Genesis Psychic TV
January 5, 2019 9:56 am ET

What the hell became
of that crazed librarian
name of StarKitten?
Haiku #61523, by Multiple Personalities of Darth
January 5, 2019 9:12 am ET

REACT you bitches.
Type something NOW. Get moving,
reactionaries.
Haiku #61522, by Ephemeral Loveliness of Haiku
January 5, 2019 9:08 am ET

Seriously what
is wrong with the Japanese?
They need Jesus Christ !
Haiku #61521, by Jesus of Nazareth TRUMP 20/20 Vision
January 5, 2019 8:58 am ET

They did deserve it.
Both Fat Man and Little boy.
I'm part Jap. Eat me.
Haiku #61520, by Glorious Burst of One Thousand Eastern Suns
January 5, 2019 8:56 am ET

Kamikaze beer
wriggling tentacle skewered
Hell: Japanese bar
Haiku #61519, by Kirin Asahi of Sapporo Extra DRY
January 5, 2019 8:51 am ET

Shoppingu-sentah
Aisu-krimu sandu-witch
Robotic Gul-friend
Haiku #61518, by Jap App for Android
January 5, 2019 8:49 am ET

Haiku lifts our souls
to views beyond the village:
distant Fuji. (FART)
Haiku #61517, by Some dumbass Jap wearing a unicorn costume made of pink polyester waving a little flag around on YouTube
January 5, 2019 8:45 am ET

Oh, for poetry
that sings of skidmarks and farts
Write on, Figpucker
Haiku #61516, by Darth F's haiku intervention squad of Freudian Regression
January 5, 2019 8:41 am ET

What not to wear, dude
Loose wrinkled beige kimono
Kimono? I'm nude!
Haiku #61515, by Laughs are Free
January 5, 2019 5:59 am ET

Kangaroo dung pile
Oddly enough, dung has pouch
Containing more dung
Haiku #61514, by God is Awesome
January 5, 2019 1:45 am ET

Frozen beard bristles
Oceanic Explosion
Arctic Iceberg Wank
Haiku #61513, by Chewbacca of Greasy
January 5, 2019 1:32 am ET