BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
131 Days
and
63131 Haikus
later...
What the hell became
of that crazed librarian
name of StarKitten?
Haiku #61523, by Multiple Personalities of Darth
January 5, 2019 9:12 am ET

REACT you bitches.
Type something NOW. Get moving,
reactionaries.
Haiku #61522, by Ephemeral Loveliness of Haiku
January 5, 2019 9:08 am ET

Seriously what
is wrong with the Japanese?
They need Jesus Christ !
Haiku #61521, by Jesus of Nazareth TRUMP 20/20 Vision
January 5, 2019 8:58 am ET

They did deserve it.
Both Fat Man and Little boy.
I'm part Jap. Eat me.
Haiku #61520, by Glorious Burst of One Thousand Eastern Suns
January 5, 2019 8:56 am ET

Kamikaze beer
wriggling tentacle skewered
Hell: Japanese bar
Haiku #61519, by Kirin Asahi of Sapporo Extra DRY
January 5, 2019 8:51 am ET

Shoppingu-sentah
Aisu-krimu sandu-witch
Robotic Gul-friend
Haiku #61518, by Jap App for Android
January 5, 2019 8:49 am ET

Haiku lifts our souls
to views beyond the village:
distant Fuji. (FART)
Haiku #61517, by Some dumbass Jap wearing a unicorn costume made of pink polyester waving a little flag around on YouTube
January 5, 2019 8:45 am ET

Oh, for poetry
that sings of skidmarks and farts
Write on, Figpucker
Haiku #61516, by Darth F's haiku intervention squad of Freudian Regression
January 5, 2019 8:41 am ET

What not to wear, dude
Loose wrinkled beige kimono
Kimono? I'm nude!
Haiku #61515, by Laughs are Free
January 5, 2019 5:59 am ET

Kangaroo dung pile
Oddly enough, dung has pouch
Containing more dung
Haiku #61514, by God is Awesome
January 5, 2019 1:45 am ET

Frozen beard bristles
Oceanic Explosion
Arctic Iceberg Wank
Haiku #61513, by Chewbacca of Greasy
January 5, 2019 1:32 am ET

Smelly deep knee bends
Consult your physician first
Low tide aerobics
Haiku #61512, by Doc of the Bay of Wasting time
January 5, 2019 1:28 am ET

The old lady smell
Just like a slap in the face
At the fish market
Haiku #61511, by Fishmonger of Trouser Trout
January 5, 2019 1:24 am ET

Washcloth on a stick
Reach around to scour my ass
My thoughts turn to you
Haiku #61510, by Picture That
January 5, 2019 1:08 am ET

Salty human flesh
Stringy and mostly tasteless
Roll you in Panko

Look for the wet spot
But it
Haiku #61509, by Foodie
January 5, 2019 1:05 am ET

Food was delivered
Foot Longpig Sandwiches
Ate UberEats guy
Haiku #61508, by Crunchy penis
January 5, 2019 1:02 am ET

What if I told you
The secret to poetry
Lies in your own farts
Haiku #61507, by Poet of Head in (fart) clouds
January 4, 2019 9:21 pm ET

So your dick
Haiku #61506, by Anonymous Poet
January 4, 2019 9:11 pm ET

They
Haiku #61505, by Poopstain of On the run(s)
January 4, 2019 9:02 pm ET

When the cops show up
Let out a big fart and run
Leave them in your dust
Haiku #61504, by Poopstain Bolt of On the run(s)
January 4, 2019 8:45 pm ET

You just missed it, bud
Rank post holidays fart fest
A nose full of news
Haiku #61503, by Ima Fullogas of Creaky Porch
January 4, 2019 8:43 pm ET

Yeah, we
Haiku #61502, by Entrepreneur Furrburger Queef of Business Luncheon
January 4, 2019 8:40 pm ET

Starting a business
Similar to Amazon
But only sell farts
Haiku #61501, by Butt of Smelly Fartville
January 4, 2019 8:38 pm ET

Temporarily
So don
Haiku #61500, by Jerk
January 4, 2019 5:28 pm ET

I didn
Haiku #61499, by Let the poets speak
January 4, 2019 4:21 pm ET

Farts for currency
Who wants to be millionaires?
I didn
Haiku #61498, by Poopstain of In your pants
January 4, 2019 4:21 pm ET

Bankers will get theirs
when Lucifer gets his ass
handed to him (Hell).
Haiku #61497, by Prince Alexandre Louis Philippe Marie Berthier of the House of Rothschild
January 4, 2019 3:17 pm ET

He's the town pervert
But they pronounce it Pre Vert
I just call him Dad
Haiku #61496, by Mr. Fritzl's daughter of Not in basement
January 4, 2019 5:53 am ET

Poconos Humpfest
Beautiful Mt. Airy Lodge
Mount a lot of things
Haiku #61495, by Jingle singer of Heart shaped Bathtub
January 4, 2019 5:39 am ET

Barstool of New Year
Occupation: Town Drunkard
Seeing double now
Haiku #61494, by Town Drunkard of Barstool
January 4, 2019 4:32 am ET

Cigarette Machine
Cough up the booty, robot!
Way back in the day
Haiku #61493, by Automated of Machine
January 4, 2019 4:21 am ET

Wonka wonka woo
Now thrusting dance on table
Crashing to the floor
Haiku #61492, by Eddie's mom of Dive Bar
January 4, 2019 4:19 am ET

Relax. Visualize.
Captain and Tenille screwing
Muskrat in rear end
Haiku #61491, by Guided Relaxation of Floor
January 4, 2019 4:18 am ET

Cancan dancers kick
Who opened the tuna fish?
From row seats fishy
Haiku #61490, by Audience of Front Row
January 4, 2019 4:15 am ET

Gates of Good Fortune
Wide open like your sister
Without the fish smell
Haiku #61489, by Tally Whacker of Corner of Cockles and Mussels
January 4, 2019 2:17 am ET

Camel had a toe
Hot sand. Million miles to go
Dry hump Dry hump hump
Haiku #61488, by Dry Hump of Hump
January 4, 2019 2:14 am ET

Word in name congealed
Left a bad taste in your mouth
Find nearest spittoon
Haiku #61487, by Sal Iva
January 4, 2019 12:13 am ET

Dickens cider
Haiku #61486, by Anonymous Poet
January 3, 2019 9:08 pm ET

Trying to get some
Dickens
Haiku #61485, by Surf, Turf, and Afterbirth of Produce
January 3, 2019 9:07 pm ET

Great Expectations
Dissolved by reality
VeneREAL LIFE
Haiku #61484, by Pip trying to get Dickens of Some dusty pub
January 3, 2019 9:04 pm ET

Dickensian twins . . .
their names: Ignorance and Want.
Did you mean those two?
Haiku #61483, by Sale of Two Titties
January 3, 2019 7:56 pm ET

Abuse and Neglect
Expecting twins? Perfect names.
Congratulations!
Haiku #61482, by Living Abortion
January 3, 2019 6:26 pm ET

Come see my belle chose
Give the lotion. Give the hose.
C'est la vie en rose
Haiku #61481, by Frenchy of Oooooo la la
January 3, 2019 5:28 pm ET

A fragrant French whore
beckons me to approach
and empty my balls
Haiku #61480, by Packing Master of NYC
January 3, 2019 4:47 pm ET

I ain't no sex doll
I'm the Michelin Tire Man
Got rubbers covered
Haiku #61479, by Complimentary Lube of Busy Corner
January 3, 2019 4:42 pm ET

That sex-joke punchline:
Those two inflatable dolls
Wait. Let me think first
Haiku #61478, by Her breath inside of me
January 3, 2019 3:32 pm ET

It's necessary.
Submit to my bad haiku.
Submit to Islam.
Haiku #61477, by Taqiyya of Submission
January 3, 2019 3:30 pm ET

Yo it aint like dat . . .
aint like dat at ALL, gnome sain?
People be like: damn.
Haiku #61476, by Guy about to shoot you because you got the WalMart parking space and he kind of violent
January 3, 2019 3:27 pm ET

Oh bright liquid fire
Temple elixir of bliss . . .
what was I saying ?
Haiku #61475, by Loku Wi-Fi of Pseudo-oriental Splendors
January 3, 2019 3:23 pm ET

Oh haiku maidens
Oh ye nine mini-muses
Draw near and inspire
Haiku #61474, by Asahi EXTRA-DRY of Sapporo 生 発泡酒 More Please
January 3, 2019 3:20 pm ET