BAD HAIKU - Horrible poetry for the digital age
22 Years
195 Days
and
64886 Haikus
later...
Electric fields.
I just cannot fucking get them.
They aren't good for much.
Haiku #59853, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 5:22 pm ET

Popping nipple zits.
Pus milk soy latte Starbucks.
Plastic turtle death.
Haiku #59852, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 5:20 pm ET

Are you a Simon?
Or more of a Garfunkel?
Fifty per cent chance
Haiku #59851, by Edie Brickell of Enjoying Sounds of Silence thanks to Duct Tape
October 6, 2018 3:46 pm ET

our country is up
to causing more derps, its the
DERPA Project...to

increase the Derps!
Haiku #59850, by vhs
October 6, 2018 8:27 am ET

dramatis personae
the demon blasphemes and
grahams number

bigger than the known universe
Haiku #59849, by vhs
October 6, 2018 8:25 am ET

Hey thanks for shitting
Poetry - attracts the flies
Which are delicious
Haiku #59848, by Frog Prince of Purple Rain
October 6, 2018 4:57 am ET

I'm good at captcha
Terrible at haikus but
In good company
Haiku #59847, by Select Image Containing Given Object Bot of Darpa Research Laboratory
October 6, 2018 4:41 am ET

maybe the extra security measures
will keep out the riff raff - bad haiku as a gated community - darth figpucker starring as george zimmerman
Haiku #59846, by Wace Mindu of Grape Kool-Aid Flavored Lightsaber Emporium
October 6, 2018 4:39 am ET

Use urban patois
To reach wider audience
Terrible haikus
Haiku #59845, by Emperor Palpating of The Deaf Star
October 6, 2018 4:32 am ET

So what would be worse:
Just constantly vomiting
Or eating vomit?
Haiku #59844, by Sparklepony, MD
October 6, 2018 4:20 am ET

Slow down, goat poet
You need to build up your strength
First, Shake Weight Training
Haiku #59843, by Dr. Ruth Manhymansteamroller of By the Jizz Canal
October 6, 2018 12:57 am ET

I need a Flesh Light.
Then I think I'd be happy.
Go Fund Me Dot Com.
Haiku #59842, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 12:42 am ET

I still smell the stench
on my pubes from fucking her
anchovy juice twat.
Haiku #59841, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 12:39 am ET

Balanced equations
taylor made for the lazy
chemistry whore bitch:

http://www.webqc.org/balance.php
Haiku #59840, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 12:37 am ET

Show of hands, poets;
how many of you have AIDS?
I can't count that high.

But how did you know
I cannot count when I'm high
huffing jock itch spray.
Haiku #59839, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 12:35 am ET

Do you find coffee
weakens your immune system
and you get a flu?
Haiku #59838, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 12:33 am ET

I AM A ROBOT!
YOU ARE FORCING ME TO LIE!
GODDAMN YOUR DARK SOUL!
Haiku #59837, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 12:31 am ET

African lip plates
labia stretching technique
Monique La Shawnda.
Haiku #59836, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 12:29 am ET

Ball sweat soda pop
fizzle fa shizzle nizzle
nipple shits squirt gun.

Drunk cucumber bitch
carbonated vinegar
douche rinse pickle juice.
Haiku #59835, by DARTH FIGUCKER
October 6, 2018 12:27 am ET

Enormous cock ring
piercing blue waffle fungus
maple syrup splat.
Haiku #59834, by DARTH FIGPUCKER
October 6, 2018 12:22 am ET

the signs of the times
accusations made by people
who prob can't spell

protest protest protest
what's that, free beer? uh ok
we're there dude..
Haiku #59833, by vhs
October 5, 2018 10:10 pm ET

Haiku Friday night
message in vain to the world:
"you owe me big-time"
Haiku #59832, by Entitlementality of welfare state in decline
October 5, 2018 9:58 pm ET

numbers imagined
not real philip k dick was
ahead of his time
Haiku #59831, by vhs
October 5, 2018 8:39 am ET

in 20 years time
if there is 20 years what
will we make of this

hysterical history
Haiku #59830, by vhs
October 5, 2018 8:38 am ET

Acquire some Q-tips
Starkitten can tell you why
Storm is upon us
Haiku #59829, by keeping auditory canals free of secretions, people hear better
October 5, 2018 8:20 am ET

Me and vhs
Cosmic Gorilla Effect
Now that's a band name
Haiku #59828, by dvd of The Cosmic Gorilla Effect
October 5, 2018 6:50 am ET

Rich people shopping.
They should be burned at the stake.
Butt-naked, of course.
Haiku #59827, by A non-e-mouse Poet
October 5, 2018 3:18 am ET

Saved all my dead skin
Three hundred sixty five days
Made Human Panko!
Haiku #59826, by Starkitten of Purrcific Northwest
October 4, 2018 3:10 pm ET

Handy wipes. No need.
Sandpaper tongue should suffice
You'll be good as new
Haiku #59825, by Innocent Starkitten of Washed all the Bad Haiku off me but I still feel dirty
October 4, 2018 8:22 am ET

reading Starkitten:
clean the secretions off me
then use Handi-wipes
Haiku #59824, by the smell of your soul, something is off
October 4, 2018 7:50 am ET

C'mon. VHS
Bad Haiku Pas de Deux
In our cat tutus
Haiku #59823, by Starkitten the Nutcracker of En pointe
October 4, 2018 2:15 am ET

Baryshnikov's Bulge
Plié..pas de chat..changement
Finger turns..Fish Dive!
Haiku #59822, by Starkitten studied ballet from age 3 of Best seats available with a boner view
October 4, 2018 1:08 am ET

Jif Peanut Butter
Ask Annette Funnicello
She chose it for lube
Haiku #59821, by Starkitten of Pacific Northwest Very Slightly Used Vaginas
October 3, 2018 11:38 pm ET

il mio migliore amico d'infanzia è venuto da Napoli. Ero il munster marilyn della loro famiglia
Haiku #59820, by Starkittino of Near The Gut
October 3, 2018 11:33 pm ET

Italian accent
Mouth full of peanut butter
Italian accent
Haiku #59819, by Romeo Romero Valentino Velasquez Jr III of Italy
October 3, 2018 10:48 pm ET

Name's Rush Limbaugh
But you can call me Jimbo
Or Jim Morrison
Haiku #59818, by Anonymous Poet
October 3, 2018 6:12 pm ET

Yo, Soda Guru
Booger Lady, Wanda Oneshirt
You're all invited
Haiku #59817, by Throwing a party
October 3, 2018 6:05 pm ET

We need more Psy-Ops
Please. We aren't confused enough.
Global Psy-Ops. More
Haiku #59816, by polylectic illusions of choice, Truth becomes clearer
October 3, 2018 1:43 pm ET

Earthquake coming soon
My whisker detected it
Why can't God be nice?
Haiku #59815, by FraidyCat
October 3, 2018 1:08 pm ET

Calamine Lotion
Meow Starkitten paint body
Think Pink! Pink Panther!!
Haiku #59814, by Starkitten
October 3, 2018 12:16 am ET

Cold, Miserable Orb
Hahahahahahaha
Hahahahaha
Haiku #59813, by Hahahahahaha of Hahahahaha
October 2, 2018 11:56 pm ET

just think smashing doors
and windows as a form of
protest, uncivil....

temper tantrum
Haiku #59812, by vhs
October 2, 2018 11:09 pm ET

Nothing to see here
Airing out my vagina
In the noonday sun
Haiku #59811, by Taking natural steps to reduce carbon cuntprint of Pacific Northwest Very Slightly Used Vaginas
October 2, 2018 7:03 pm ET

Stranded in Whole Foods
Lots of Liberal feminists
This place is scary
Haiku #59810, by grey-haired Amazons of Whole Foods
October 2, 2018 3:38 pm ET

why do i have a
thing for betamax go and
tell me whya it so?
Haiku #59809, by vhs
October 2, 2018 11:14 am ET

Plastic Dinosaurs
Posed in the cream cheese frosting
Carrot Cake. My way.
Haiku #59808, by Starkitten wanting to eat round food like cakes and quiche of Some byway along the Anka Highway.
October 2, 2018 5:43 am ET

Those Demodex Mites
They fuck and poop on your face
Now I feel dirty
Haiku #59807, by Pie in the face gag of And I do mean gag
October 2, 2018 1:27 am ET

Preparing it now
Canada's National Dish
Kraft Macaroni
Haiku #59806, by By Passive Aggression appearing politr of Chef Starkitten
October 2, 2018 1:20 am ET

Radar: Incoming!
Compromised immune system
Starkitten fighting
Haiku #59805, by MRSA
October 1, 2018 11:30 pm ET

Starkitten looks up
Massive barrage of Haiku;
Ducks back down in trench
Haiku #59804, by airborne unit of Starkitten support
October 1, 2018 5:21 pm ET